Foreplay

ok, since you gave me that
lovely visual of us in bed
I thought turn about was fair play
or is it more like foreplay
the thoughts I've been having of us
are more of a first kiss kind of thing
I've imagined you standing
with your back against a wall
I haven't paid any attention
to where your hands are
but I know exactly where my hands...
oh, wait a minute
I'm getting ahead of myself
let me start over
your back is against the wall
I am standing in front of you
I step in a little closer
but I still haven't made contact yet
no contact except for the eyes
damn, I'm giving myself chills here
the eyes, we just keep staring
into each other's eyes
then the left corner of my mouth turns up
into just the hint of a smile
you watch my mouth
and smile just a bit, too
I close my eyes for a second and inhale deeply
breathing in the scent of you
the urge to kiss you is so strong now
I can wait no longer, I simply must move
I feel completely drawn to you
I place my hands on your cheeks
then slowly, ever so slowly
I slide my hands back into your hair
then I slide my hands forward again
gently cupping your face in my palms
you let your head drop a little
closing your eyes as you enjoy
the warmth of my hands on your skin
now our breathing starts to pick up
then my thumbs glide very slowly over your lips
back and forth, your lips part just a bit
as a tiny gasp escapes from them
I softly moan in response
I watch every single movement
your lips, my thumbs
my lips are now so jealous of my thumbs
for they must have you
they must feel you, my thumbs move
to the corners of your mouth
I lick my lips and I lean in
as my hands pull you towards me
towards my lips, my waiting lips
I whisper "Kodi" just before our lips touch
which is gentle at first
then we press them into each other
I could just devour you
but I don't, I hold back
I press the weight of my body into yours
which causes both of us
to groan deeply at the contact
my hands now have moved into your hair
I scrape my fingernails
gently on your scalp
causing you to shiver into me
I smile into your mouth
you open your lips just a bit
I slide my tongue passed them
as your tongue greets mine
for the very first time

shall I go on?
do you want more?

5.4.00

CMT

Author's Notes

On May 3rd, Kodi responded to several emails that I'd sent her the day before. In one of them, she described her physical attributes and then admitted to thinking about me "in that way." And later on in the email, she wrote:

"But I have to admit your words touch me and you've got me thinking about you a lot. And not just about what it might be like to be with you. This may sound really sappy, but I think about you holding me at night, you know, the "spoon position" and you wrapping your arms around me and maybe stroking my shoulders or running your fingers through my hair, maybe kissing my neck... okay, it degenerates into sex, but hey, cut me some slack, I've been celibate for a long time. :) (Actually, afterwards, I did imagine holding you and you holding me until I fell asleep.)"

I wrote her back the next day and admitted to doing the same thing. Then I wrote the above to give her an idea of exactly what I'd been thinking.

Earlier in the week, I was so excited to have Kodi's phone number. But soon, the reality of actually having to make the call set in, and I was scared to death. I was nervous about my southern accent and worried that we wouldn't have anything to talk about. In another email, I admitted my fears to Kodi. To my surprise, she totally understood and told me that my fears made her feel better; they made me seem more real. This calmed me down, and made me feel better too. So, we made plans for me to call her Friday night. But after I wrote this poem, I knew there was no way I could wait one more day to call. I needed to talk to her sooner. I needed to talk to her right then.

But that Thursday, I had dinner plans with a friend after work, and I wasn't able to call Kodi until around nine o'clock that night. I didn't have anything to worry about; we both loved the sound of each other's voice. So much so, that we talked all night long, until seven o'clock the next morning. And I was worried.

I went to work the next day, too, even though I hadn't had any sleep. I know staying on the phone all night wasn't the smartest thing to do, but I never said I was using my head either.

In reality, our first kiss wasn't anything at all like the poem. It was anything but slow and gentle. It was a very hard, intense, needy, passionate kiss, one that took my breath away and left me wanting more.