Release

Sometimes I cry

With painstaking slowness
I open my clenched fist
The muscles tremble and shake
As I struggle to release my grip
A grip held so tightly for so long
A grip held on the false sense of control
Control of everything around me
As if I could truly control anything
Your feelings, my feelings,
You, me, our love, my passion, my desires

Sometimes I cry

With agonizing slowness
I open my heart and mind to the truth
As I watch us slowly release
Each other from the past
From the pain, from the guilt
From the promises and from ourselves
Releasing each other to the freedom
We both so desperately seek
The freedom to fly, to live, to love
To be simply who we need to be
Who we truly are

Sometimes I cry

1.21.00

CMT

Author's Notes

Wolfmoon and I had known each other for over twenty years and we'd both found it very difficult to just let go of each other, of the past. But I was also letting go of some of my illusions of love. Where you think you've got control and you really don't. You don't really have any control over anything.

As I talked to Wolfmoon on the phone and she told me about something her and "Wind Dancer" were doing, I began to realize that we were finally letting go. And that's what this poem is about; letting go and how hard it can be. It's not something that happens overnight. It takes a long time. At least, it does for me. I'm not sure about anyone else.