Chapter 21

Case stood under the hot water and tried to think. She knew there was no talking to Antonio, regardless of what she'd told Rain. Whatever had made him decide to get rid of her, she knew he wouldn't change his mind about it. It would make him look weak and he couldn't afford that.

She still had no idea why Antonio had turned on her, but she supposed it didn't really matter. The fact was that he had and now she had to find a way to survive.

Her first thought was to run. Now that she was sure Antonio intended to have her killed, there was no reason to stick around. She had planned for this eventuality shortly after accepting her position as assassin.

Case had been slowly migrating her money overseas, making small cash withdrawals and then transferring them from one bank account to another until the bulk of the money could be wired to accounts outside the United States. It also made the funds untraceable to Antonio and therefore free of suspicion or possible seizure. At last count, she'd estimated that she could live comfortably off the interest alone for the rest of her life. But she'd always known that doing so would mean leaving the country and that didn't exactly appeal to her. Not to mention the fact that Antonio didn't just let people leave his organization. But she could technically leave tonight, if she wanted.

Of course, if she did that, there would be no doubt in Antonio's mind that Rain had tipped her off and he'd probably order a hit on the woman.

Case imagined Rain being hauled in front of Antonio. The torture Rain would have to endure as Antonio tried to find out if she knew where Case had gone. Then Rain's half-dead body being dragged to some out of the way place, before someone like Case put a gun to the back of her head and blew her face off.

Case felt nauseous with the fear and helplessness that suddenly tried to overwhelm her. She could feel her chest tightening and the need to scream was intense. The feelings were familiar, but she'd learned to suppress them long ago, along with all her other emotions. She concentrated on her breathing and forced everything away from her. Nothing mattered and she didn't care about anything.

Case shook her head and continued to soap her body as the feelings faded into numbness, though her heart continued to thud slightly in memory.

Rain would just have to take care of herself. She had the entire government backing her, whereas Case was on her own. Case's mind flashed on several scenes of Rain's death and Case gave up the act almost as quickly as she'd begun it. She couldn't leave Rain to face Antonio alone.

Case leaned against the wall in resignation for a few moments and then suddenly slammed her wet fist into the tile.

"Fuck!" she hissed out.

It was stupid to even consider protecting the FBI Agent, now that her own life was on the line, but she found herself doing just that. If she stayed, she was asking for a bullet in the head.

Case ran through several scenarios, trying to find one that worked.

She thought of faking her death, making it look like Rain had followed through on Antonio's orders early. But Antonio would want to see Case's body and if there weren't one, Rain would probably be executed on the spot for attempting to deceive him.

Another thought flitted through Case's mind, but it didn't take long for her to reject it. Rain would never agree to come with her because of her obligation to the FBI. The fact that Case even considered asking the woman to run with her made Case extremely uneasy.

But running wasn't the answer anyway. As soon as she disappeared, Antonio would alert his subordinates and then they'd set their own people on her in order to please the boss. Though his rivals might protect her for a little while to gain information, they'd eventually sell her out to the highest bidder, which would almost certainly be Antonio.

At least she knew no one was gunning for her, yet. According to Rain, Antonio was waiting for the apprentice's training to be a little more complete before he issued Case's termination orders, which meant she didn't have to decide anything tonight.

Case rinsed her hair and body one last time and then turned off the water. After drying herself off, she picked up her clothes from the floor and carried them out into the room.

Rain was watching TV in the nude, one leg raised and the other straight out on the bed.

"Hey, I thought I told you to get some rest," Case said.

"I'm not tired," Rain replied.

"Bullshit. You're exhausted."

Rain went back to staring at the television screen. She'd been dead tired before her conversation with Doc, but now her mind was racing and she knew sleep was a long ways off.

Case threw her clothes on top of her bag and walked over to the bed. She sat down facing the brunette and crossed her legs into the pretzel position.

"What's going on?" Case asked bluntly. "Was there something else that Doc said that you didn't tell me about?"

Rain continued to stare at the TV as though she hadn't heard the question, but just as Case was about to ask again, Rain spoke.

"What are we going to do?"

It was Case's turn to look away. So far, she'd come up with a lot of no-win scenarios, but at least she was narrowing down the possibilities.

"I'll think of something," Case said confidently. "Now go to sleep."

Case started to get off the bed, but Rain reached out and caught her wrist. Without thought, Case twisted her wrist to break the hold. A split second later, she'd caught Rain's hand with her own, pressed her thumb into the woman's palm, and twisted her arm up behind her. The move turned Rain partially over, while Case used her other arm to push on Rain's shoulder to turn her over completely and pin her to the bed. As Case was about to bring her knee up to press into Rain's spine, she realized what she was doing and let go, and then backed away.

"Sorry," Case mumbled, and continued to stand where she was about a foot from the edge of the bed.

Rain rubbed her wrist and shrugged her shoulder to make sure it was okay.

"It's all right. I shouldn't have grabbed you like that. I just..." didn't want you to leave, Rain finished the thought silently.

"What?" Case asked.

Rain shook her head.

"Come on, what?" Case asked again, a little more impatiently, as she sat back down.

Rain racked her brain for a plausible response that would sidetrack Case without actually talking about anything that was really bothering her.

"How did you deal with it? Your first hit," Rain finally said.

Case relaxed a little and then nodded in understanding.

"I threw up. Then I worked out until I could barely walk and then I passed out. When I woke up the next morning, I just made myself not think about it."

Case didn't continue, but now Rain was curious.

"Have you ever fucked up on a job?"

Case was surprised at the question, but she nodded her head.

"Yeah, once."

Rain waited, but Case didn't say any more.

"What happened?" Rain finally asked.

Case looked around the room. Why was it that Rain always seemed to want to make her uncomfortable when she was the one that was freaking out about something?

"Things were supposed to be a certain way when I got there and they weren't. I handled it."

Rain snorted.

"Could you have been just a little more vague? I think I might have understood some of that."

Case rolled her eyes. She really didn't want to talk about this, but she had a feeling Rain wasn't going to let it go.

"All right. If I tell you what happened, will you go to sleep?"

Rain thought it over.

"You'll tell me the whole story?" Rain asked.

Case nodded her head.

Rain studied her, but finally nodded her head in return and used the remote to turn off the TV.

"Okay, tell me the story," Rain agreed, doing a good imitation of a five-year-old as she settled herself into the bed a little more comfortably.

"Promise," Case ordered.

"I promise to go to sleep if you tell me the story."

Case nodded her acceptance of the deal and then tried to figure out where to begin. It took her a moment, but then she simply started right in.

"There was this guy, named Tony Massucci, who decided to try to cut a deal with the Feds. Antonio found out and I got the call to take care of the problem. I had a week to figure out how to set up the hit and the only rule was no witnesses, so I could do it any way I wanted. I decided to take him out at his home, one bullet to the head. His wife was supposed to take their three kids to some concert they'd been planning to see for weeks, so I figured that would be the perfect time. Tony was always working and he almost never went out with them, so they hadn't even bought him a ticket. I'd cased the place, so I knew exactly where he'd be. I timed it so that I would get there half an hour after the family had left.

"I went in and everything was perfect. Massucci was right where I'd thought he'd be. He started begging right off and I told him to shut up, but he wouldn't. He just kept going on about his kids and how much he loved his wife. He even told me he could set up a deal for me, if I let him and his family live. I laughed at him. I was about to kill him for turning narc and he wanted me to put myself in the same position. I told him he was an idiot and then forced him onto his knees. He just kept begging me not to kill his family and that's when I realized what he meant."

Case remembered the dread that had flooded through her body and made her heart thud when she'd understood that the wife and kids were still in the house. She'd known instantly what she was going to have to do. She'd tried to tell herself that as long as they stayed upstairs, where Tony had said they were, she could leave without being seen and therefore leave no witnesses, but the more calculating part of her mind had known the truth.

"Massucci finally just started begging me to kill him, but to leave his family alone. I told him he should've thought of that before he went to the FBI. But then he kicked me and we started wrestling for the gun. It went off, but the silencer kept it from making too much noise. But we crashed into some stuff while we were fighting and I guess they heard it upstairs. They all came down to investigate. By the time they were in the doorway, I'd gotten the gun back under control and shot him.

"They just stood there and stared at me, all crowded in the doorway."

Case stopped talking. She'd never told anyone about this, never even said the words before.

"What did you do?" Rain asked, though she had a pretty good idea of what had happened next.

"I killed them. All of them."

Case was numb and Rain could see the absence of light in the assassin's eyes. As the silence continued, Rain realized Case was gone. She was somewhere in her past and she'd probably stay there unless Rain could bring her attention back to the present.

"So, then what happened?" Rain asked.

It took a moment, but Case eventually looked up.

"I took off. I guess I tried to leave. I'm not sure. When Antonio's men found me a month later, I was almost dead from alcohol poisoning and malnutrition. Then I went back to work."

Case shook her head a little as if to clear the emotions away.

"Well, there's the story," Case finished.

Case quickly stood up from the bed, so that Rain wouldn't have a chance to grab her again. Even the idea of being touched was making her feel like a caged animal. But at the same time, she just wanted to disappear into Rain's embrace.

Case closed her eyes the way she always did to give herself an extra second to adjust to the dark before turning off the lights.

"Night," Case offered.

A few seconds later, Case headed for the second bed. Rain watched the dark form move silently through the room. The vibes that Case was throwing off screamed at Rain to just leave her alone, to turn over, and go to sleep. But Rain's own need to be touched at the moment overrode her usual acceptance of Case's need for space.

Rain quietly got up and knelt down next to Case's bed, so that she wasn't towering over the reclining woman. It only took a few seconds for Case to roll over and look at Rain's shadowed face.

"What?" Case asked gruffly.

She didn't have any spare energy to coddle Rain at the moment.

"Can I hold you?" Rain asked quietly.

Case felt the tears spring to her eyes in half a heartbeat and her throat closed up from too much emotion. Her first instinct was to run, to scream, to kick the shit out of Rain for making her feel anything. Instead, she nodded her head and scooted over enough for Rain to join her in the bed.

Rain was surprised at how quickly and easily Case snuggled up to her. Case's arm wrapped around her torso and held on for dear life. Rain returned the tight hug and that was when she felt the silent sobs that were shaking Case's body. Rain squeezed tighter and began muttering soothing words to the crying woman in an attempt to ease her suffering.

As Rain watched the black sky change to a gray-blue through the breaks in the curtains, Case finally drifted off to what seemed to be a restful sleep. But Rain remained awake, alone with her thoughts and her fading hope.

She didn't have a prayer of getting them both out safely and she knew it. At the very least, Case would be facing the death penalty for having killed so many people. Rain herself would be on dozens of hit lists as a key witness against Carlotti, so it was possible she wouldn't even live to see him go on trial for his crimes. But with all the evidence Rain and the others on the case were gathering, she knew he would eventually end up in prison. It was her only consolation, along with the fact that she had killed her brother's murderer.

Rain closed her eyes and her arms tightened unconsciously around Case. As she followed Case into dreamland, she promised herself she would do anything it took to keep them both safe. Anything.